true love is blamed?!

of all the pain, the greatest of pain are that nerve wrecking words to hear when your true love is blamed, without even questioning. i feel that disquieting welter of emotions are all lost in hearing that paralyzing words which are effortlessly thrown out without even a slightest concern of how heartbreaking it would feel to the other person.

may be is the deeds that are done in the past that reflect the present, may be its that reckon of not having the ability to realize true love in the bygone days. the present is so painful that you get to realize that it was a similar situation that was caused by you in the past.

i know that the past repeats in itself, but never could assess the intensity of the pain that it would bring with it. i am sad to be sorry of the broken moments that i caused, which i face in the present. but then i realize that it was that deed of mine that gave that strong heart to those, for them to be in the position they are in now. hope the exact same doesn't happen to me. just to save the present to be intact. i realize that true love.. again, just cant afford to loose it.

America - an(d) Indian thought!

they say its the land of opportunities, facing the facts at the moment are different thought, but i am not going to write about the opportunity this land has created instead wanted to talk about the options it has to live the life at will. in the first quarter of my life, i have learnt to live in a way where my endurance would be specific to me and no one else could have possibly endured it. the pain, the peace in mind has taken me to a state of mind where the Indian moment comes to place.

being and living the Indian tradition is nevertheless worth-full if true love is blamed

true love is never lost!

i am a person who believes in the gut feeling. the tremendous pressure, of all that i have gone through in the recent past, i have this gut feeling that she is "the one". from the very first moment i saw here on from a stereotyped staircase on a wonderful morning, in an elegant yellow traditional dress, with a beautiful half smile and shimmering shoulder length hair and a nostalgic looking spectacles. i was dumbstruck, even more when the gut feeling of "she is mine" pondered over my heart.

the gut, says it all and it says it to let go on others decisions, going with the heart and mind in sync is the best of feelings.

believing in destiny and in God, would always result in a happy ending.. hope that comes true..not sure whats written, but confident of the fact that all would be in best of interest..what a Player!!

and the delirious life worsens ...

huh!! lost the passion, lost the power, lost zeal and left with illusion. thats what you get when are true to the heart, at least in terms of settling down in a relationship. all the gratitudes of life are flickering in dillusion at the present state of my mind and as i write i feel sick of it.

why? why in the hell? did i try to get in, didn't i try to get out? knowing that there would be pain more than the sweet sooth of love. i have been dwindling and now am a such phase of life, that it should have been better.

the more caring u try to be, that more wrathful the situation would turn to be. it is always to be in that dont care attitude that the are to be treated with. deception is the only best way to make and keep control. i knew it from the very begining, but couldnt never implement it. thats the charm a girl, you truely love, would batter you with.

beware my friends its a complicated love story...